Thursday, April 30, 2009

As You Slide Down the Banister of Life

As You Slide Down the Banister of Life, Remember:



1. Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written
an impressive new book. It's called ...
“Ministers Do More Than Lay People”

2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink
and be Mary.




3. The difference between the Pope and
your boss is the Pope only expects you
to kiss his ring.

4. My mind works like lightning; one brilliant
flash and it is gone.


5. The only time the world beats a path to
your door is if you're in the bathroom.



6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once.
The seat folded up, the drink spilled and
that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.


7. It used to be only death and taxes
Now, of course, there's
shipping and handling, too.



8. A husband is someone who, after taking
the trash out, gives the impression that
he just cleaned the whole house..


9 My next house will have no kitchen - just
vending machines and a large trash can.

10. A blonde said, “I was worried that my
mechanic might try to rip me off.
I was relieved when he told me all
I needed was turn signal fluid.'


11. Definition of a teenager?
God's punishment...for enjoying sex.

12. As you slide down the banister of life, may
the splinters never point the wrong way.


4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Uhm, errr, can he be someone OTHER than Mary ? ;-)

Dutch said...

Those are so funny. Thanks for the laughs.

Linda's World said...

Love them all ! LOL!!!
Linda in Washington

Sage Ravenwood said...

Lol, just read Mary's comment. As for a husband being someone who takes out the trash and acts like he cleaned the whole house - that was spot on. (Hugs)Indigo

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