The kindness of friends.

We went out today and had our Monday night date. Our friend we meet on Monday was there with a vase of home grown flowers and a basket of fresh vegetables. Russian tomatoes, eggplants, fresh green beans, tomatoes and green peppers. We had a meal of appetizers, fresh beer and wonderful wine. Made plans for next Monday. It was a wonderful night.

The Health Care Reform bill

Is posted in it's entirety here. I urge everyone to read it, unlike most of our elected officials. Actually the delay has allowed many of them to read it and that is why you are seeing objections on both sides. Nobody, and I mean nobody that has read the bill in its entirety would want the government in your pocket this bad. I would have to close all my banking accounts. Get paid in cash. But my hospital wouldn't be able to do that, no employer would be able to, it will be against the law to not let the government in your bank account.

This is not about everyone getting health care. If you can afford a big screen TV, cable, cell phone charges..... you can afford to get health care. Its out there.

So anyway. I have read it.....and reread it. Have you?

And by the way. I am not a member of the mob. I am not a terrorist. I am not a Republican or a Democrat. I am not a organizer. I am not out of control. And I am not a idiot. What am I?

I am an American. I am a woman. I am a caregiver. I am soon to be a senior citizen. I am a grandmother. I am a mother. I am your neighbor. I am rational. I am intelligent. I am a conservative. I wish nobody any harm. Ever. I know what I am reading. I am literate. And I will not give up control of my life. I know best what's best for me.

Marinated Cherry tomatoes

I have been getting a ton of cherry tomatoes. When I got the blight on my plants I was afraid they were done for, but thankfully not. So today I made a bowl of marinated tomatoes. I used to have a recipe but now I just throw the stuff together. It is so yummy. I take the tomatoes and cut them in half. I either use thin sliced red or green onions and add in. Then I use a small amount of olive oil, balsamic vinegar, oregano oil, a tiny bit of sugar substitute, and parsley and let it soak. The longer it soaks the better they are. They are great on a leafy green salad or just alone.

So here I am thinking about food again, LOL. I am hopeless. I also picked some rhubarb and am going to make a rhubarb strawberry pie. I cut the sugar in half by using the whey low sugar substitute. I would use only that but it doesn't thicken the same. Tastes exactly like sugar though and has only 5 calories is natural. It is the best sugar substitute I have ever found. I can't stand most of the sugar subs. That nasty after taste.

We were going to go to the zoo today but I have several things I want to do today so tomorrow we are going. I need to get my camera's ready. And I have to clean out Chester's cage. So we will make a day of it tomorrow.

A weird thing happened a little while ago. I craved a cigarette. It has been 5 years on the 1st of next month. I rarely even think about them and haven't had a craving for at least a year. Just out of the blue. I was such a dedicated smoker. It controlled my life. I couldn't sit through a movie, the first thing I did in the morning or after a meal, light up. I wouldn't go places you couldn't smoke and after my heart cath as soon as I could get up I went out for a smoke. I smoked though both my pregnancies and throughout my childrens childhood. Sometimes more then 2 packs a day. And once during a blizzard I ran out and actually thought about walking to the store 14 blocks away. 14 inches of snow, so hard you couldn't see, freezing temps and I was going to walk. But my neighbor had a spare pack.

Looking back now I can see how sick that was. Even then I hated its control over me. I have never regreted quitting. I worry that the years of smoking will still catch up with me. When I developed my asthma I still couldn't believe my lungs weren't damaged from smoking. But so far so good. Anyway, so getting a craving was weird. Probably triggered by my call from the work comp people. Because nothing used to get me through a stressful situation like a smoke.

Now I just reach for something to eat, LOL. Except for I am reaching for water instead. That is how I broke my smoking habit. Carried water everywhere with me. Brushed my teeth like a million times a day and drank water any time I wanted a smoke. So I am doing that again with my binge eating. I started back yesterday making a concious effort to stop this bad habit. I had it so under control. It sneaked back in slowly. But I am giving it the heave out the door now.

Having the work comp people call kind of helped the reality of the surgery sink in. It is different now then it used to be. Now they give you an advocate who isn't associated with the hospital. They make sure your not forced into working too soon. That is nice to know. I don't want to screw the shoulder up for good. And they talked about what my income would be. Back to pennie pinching for awhile. Turns out I was suppose to be getting reinbursed for my gas mileage from PT and the doctors all this time. My work comp lady at the hospital should have mentioned it. I never thought about it. She said I can add it all up and summit it but it would be difficult to figure out. I was going for my hand and my shoulder some times. And I really don't care about it. I only care about getting fixed up and back to work without restrictions.

I am not expecting my shoulder to ever feel the same. When you get hurt and get it fixed it is never the same as it was before the injury. I mourned my old back for a couple of years. My wrists will never be the same. It is just a different type of discomfort. Mostly what you end up with is a stable back, neck or whatever was injured. But not the same. I am prone to scar tissue and that is a big reason I didn't want surgery. Oh boo hoo for me. Sigh. Anyway......

Well enough rambling. Time to tackle that cage and then I am going shopping. I want a couple of shirts that will be easy to get in and out of for after the surgery. And my favorite store is having a big sale. Yippy.

Binge eating and other bad habits.

The last several years I have been working on getting rid of my bad habits. I quit smoking, yeah. Got rid of TV because not only did I lose interest in the programing it is too easy to sit inactive in front of it all day and I know I have to be moving more. With the type of arthritis I have, and with most arthritis it is best to keep moving or you won't be able to. And I have struggled with my weight.

I lost 56 pounds. Fairly easily actually. Keeping it off however...... I have gained 28 back, lost 11 gained it back blah blah blah.

I am a binge eater plus I am not good at portion control. I can get away with it somewhat when I am riding my bike for miles. but I haven't been. And the more external things going on the more I nibble to keep my mind off things.

Oh I don't mean entire pizza's or whole containers of ice cream. I have a tootsie pop here, some popcorn a little later, some pretzels, couple of carrots, a buddie bar, nibble nibble nibble.

The more pain I am in the more I nibble, the more stress I am under....nibble nibble nibble. And the calories add up. I have such insight into my eating patterns but still do the same things over and over. And justify it also, LOL.

I really really want to lose weight before surgery. And to lose the weight I gained back. And to break this bad habit. Grab more water instead of more snacky foods. So I keep trying. Every single day. Wondering in the back of my head what I would weigh if I didn't keep trying. I swear, quitting smoking was so much easier then this. Because I just don't smoke. but once I start eating........

Is there anything that works well for anyone else with problem? Any suggestions.

BLT's

It is hot and humid in Iowa today, just like it is suppose to be this time of year. And with hot humid weather comes fresh vegetables from the sellers all over town. My tomatoes finally ripened and the corn is perfect. Yellow squash, zucchini, cherry tomatoes. So how to spend the perfect day off. Go to the library and get some books. Go get bacon and some fresh veggies, get in the pool for a couple of hours and have a cold Pale Ale and then.... BLT's.

You just can't beat a fresh tomato grown by yourself. Corn dripping with butter and salt. Yummmmmy. How many more years will this be allowed. The bacon and butter will probably be banned. Mayo, Oh No! So for now. I am indulging.

I have been reading all I can on shoulder surgeries. Dreading the surgery. My wrist is back to almost where it was before surgery so I wonder if this will be a failure also. I would seriously not have the surgery if I thought I wouldn't lose my job. Or maybe I can put it off until they tell me for sure I will lose my job if I don't have my restrictions lifted. Maybe a little over a month isn't a good thing. I have been know to change my mind a few times.

Well, my bacon is almost done. See ya all.

"Do you Want To Be A Whale Or A Mermaid?

Recently, in a large French city, a poster featuring a young, thin, and tanned woman appeared in the window of a gym. The caption beneath it read:

"THIS SUMMER, "Do you Want To Be A Whale Or A Mermaid?

A middle aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym:

To Whom It May Concern:

Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious humans). They have an active sex life, they get pregnant and have adorable baby whales. They have a wonderful time with dolphins in the seas, seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the BarrenSea and the coral reefs of Polynesia.

Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs. They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans. They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in the world.

Mermaids don't exist. If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of psychoanalysts due to identity crisis. Fish or human? Human or fish? They don't have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them, not to mention -- how could they have sex? Therefore they don't have kids either. Not to mention who wants to get close to a girl who smells like a fish store?

The choice is perfectly clear to me; I want to be a whale

P.S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that only skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver and a coffee with my friends.

With time, we gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren't heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy. Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, "Good gosh, look how smart I am!

Nancy Pelosi and NAMBLA

"That's right. Grandma Pelosi, aka Speaker Nancy Pelosi, accepts campaign funds from an organization that believes it's okay for a man to take sexual advantage of a young boy. I think more Americans need to wake up to realize just how evil Nancy Pelosi really is".

I read this today at Bunglaow Bills and thought about my darling sweet grandson and almost got sick. What is happening? What in the world is happening? And how can she ever accept a penny from a group we should spend our entire lives eliminating. Sick Sick Sick unhuman people like that. May they rest forever in hell.